Jock-O-Rama

You really like gorillas? We've got just the pet for you
 It's the way you're forced to act to survive our schools
 Make your whole life revolve around sports
 Walk tough, don't act too smart
 Be a mean machine then we'll help you get ahead
 Jock-o-Rama, save my soul
 We're under the thumb of the beef patrol
 The future of America is in their hands
 Watch it roll over Niagara Falls
 Pep rally in the holy temple and you're forced to go
 Masturbate en masse with the favored religious cult
 Cheerleaders yell "ra ra team"
 From the locker room parades the prime beef
 When archaeologists dig this up they'll either laugh or cry
 Jock-o-Rama on the brain
 Redneck-a-thon driving me insane
 The future of America is in their hands
 Watch it roll over Niagara Falls
 Unzip that old-time religion
 On the almighty football field
 Beer bellies of all ages
 Come to watch the gladiators bleed
 "Now boys, this game ain't played for fun"
 "You're going out there to win"
 "How do you win?"
 "Get out there and snap the other guy's knee"
 Beat 'em up! Beat 'em up! - Ra Ra Ra!
 Snap those spinal cords - Ha Ha Ha!
 Beat 'em up! Beat 'em up! - Ra Ra Ra!
 Snap those spinal cords - Ha Ha Ha!
 The star quarterback lies injured
 Unconscious on the football field
 Looks like his neck's been broken
 Seems to happen somewhere every year
 His mom and dad clutch themselves and cry
 Their favorite son will never walk again
 Coach says "That boy gave a hundred percent"
 "What spirit, what a man!"
 But who cares? Game's over!
 Let's go get wasted, man!
 To the 7-11, to the liquor store!
 Let's party all night and party some more!
 Another Trans-Am's wrapped itself around a telephone pole
 "I ain't drunk officer, I just fell getting out of my car"
 "Don't worry about it, son, we were that way when we were young"
 "You've got all the skills to make a damn good businessman"
 Jock-o-Rama, save my soul
 We're under the thumb of the beef patrol
 The future of America is in their hands
 Watch it roll over Niagara Falls
 Jock-o-Rama, that's the law
 Come lick the butts of the beef patrol
 If the future of America is handed to them
 Watch it roll over Niagara Falls