H.B.D.M.F.

This is your time
 This is your day
 You've waited and wondered
 You've pondered and planned
 Where will you stay? What would they say?
 How will you get there? Where will you go?
 What will they give you?
 How many friends will show? (Happy birthday everyone)
 So
 Happy birthday, here's to ya
 Happy birthday everyone
 Buy 'em a beer, give 'em a cheer
 Some love and affection
 A gift card, a cake and a hug
 ♪
 What self-respecting adult
 Makes a big deal of their birthday? (Me)
 It's time to simmer down and stop acting like you're ten (excuse me?)
 But we know you're a really big deal so let's get it out of the way
 For you and nearly two million other important people born today
 Happy birthday, here's to ya
 We know all about it 'cause you told everyone (everyone)
 It's attention that you seek
 It's a birthday, not a week
 You're a wicked, sick, sad, selfish son of a gun
 ♪
 Throw yourself a big old party (yeah)
 Rent yourself a big old hall
 Send out invitations to your shitty birthday ball
 Stop posting pictures and videos
 You think you're so cinematic (I am)
 Blow out those freaking candles and get over it
 Don't be so dramatic
 Happy birthday, here's to ya
 Happy birthday everyone
 No more beers, no more cheers
 No more love and affection
 No gift cards, no cakes and no hugs
 Happy birthday, here's to ya
 We know all about it 'cause you told everyone (everyone)
 It's attention that you seek
 It's a birthday, not a week
 You're a wicked, sick, sad, selfish son of a gun
 You're a wicked, sick, sad, selfish son of a gun
 "Guys, get together for a picture"
 "Come on, everybody"
 
 "We need a picture, come on"
 "God, will this broad get over it?"
 "Why is nobody listening to me? Get together for a picture"
 "Jesus Christ, I've had it up to here"
 "Here, you hold the camera"
 "Midnight"
 "Wrap it up please"
 "Smile!"
 "It's not your day anymore"
 "Okay"