Ignore Tenderness

I've been trying to
 Be turned on by you
 Be turned on by myself
 Or anything else
 Been watching porn
 Lights off, headphones on
 Right when pleasure begins
 My education creeps in
 I've been stripping right down
 Staring at my own reflection
 Ever since I was thirteen
 I've been pulled in every direction
 Such a good student
 Of all that conflicting advice
 Go put ice in your mouth
 Let them slap you about
 Go on, choke yourself out
 But leave no room for doubt that you are brave
 Beneath the sheets, you're just a cave
 A plastic bucket or a gravе
 Who said you're not what you get, you are what you gavе away?
 I've been thinking back
 To when things went off track
 You know that's not what I wanted
 Is that why I feel haunted?
 By something small
 Strong enough to destroy it all
 If I don't change soon
 Will it forever eclipse the moon?
 That keeps me stable
 Away from all of that advice
 That put words in my mouth
 All those drinks on the house
 Go on, just let it all out
 But leave no room for doubt that you are brave
 A little leaf catching a wave
 Strong, but willing to be saved
 Ignore the tenderness you crave
 Be naughty, but don't misbehave
 Who said you're not what you get, you are what you gave away?