Franklin Shepard, Inc.

Now, how do you two work together?
 Oh, we work togeth-
 Oh, may I answer that?
 Please!
 How do we work together?
 Sure
 He goes
 And I go
 And soon we're humming along
 Hmmm
 And that's called writing a song
 Hmmm
 Then he goes
 And I go
 And the phone goes drrrring!
 And he goes:
 Mutter mutter mutter mutter yes, Jerome
 Mutter no, Jerome
 Mutter mutter mutter mutter
 That's his lawyer, Jerome
 Mutter mutter mutter mutter mutter
 Do it, Jerome!
 Click
 Sorry, Charley
 So I go
 And he goes
 And I go
 And soon we're tapping away
 Hmmm
 Bzzz! Sorry, Charley
 Bzzz! It's the secretary
 Bzzz! On the intercom
 Yes, Miss Bzzz?
 It's a messenger!
 Thanks, Miss Bzzz
 Will you tell him to wait?
 Will you order the car?
 Will you call up the bank?
 Will you wire the coast?
 Will you-
 Drrring!
 Sorry, Charley
 Mutter mutter mutter mutter sell the stock
 Mutter buy the rights
 Mutter mutter mutter mutter mutter
 Bzzz! Let me put you on hold
 Bzzz! Yes, Miss Bzzz?
 It's the interview!
 Thanks, Miss Bzzz
 Will you tell him to wait?
 Will you wire the car?
 Will you order the coast?
 Will you send up the bank?
 And the telephones blink
 And the stocks get sold
 And the rest of us he keeps on hold
 And he's into making movies
 And he's now a corporation
 Right?
 So I play at home
 With my wife and kids
 And I wait to hear the movie bids
 And I've got a little sailboat
 And I'm into meditation
 Right?
 He flies off to California
 I discuss him with my shrink
 That's the story of the way we work
 Me and Franklin Shepard, Inc.
 Hahaha I'm surprised at how much I like this
 I promise to be honest if you promise to handle the lawsuit!
 Ah, ha. Ah...
 Now, when you do work together
 I've been curious
 Which generally comes first, Frank?
 The words or the music?
 Generally, the contract
 That sounds like you think making money is a bad thing for an artist
 Money?
 Did I say money?
 No, I like money a lot
 Hmmm
 I mean, it's better than not
 Hmmm
 But when it's
 Rww! Money!
 Rww! Rww! Money! Rww!
 When you're into- money
 And you should be!
 Listen
 Frank does the money thing very well
 But you know what?
 There are other people who do it better
 And Frank does the music thing very well
 And you know what?
 No one does it better
 Still the telephones blink
 And the buzzers buzz
 And I really don't know what he does
 But he makes a ton of money
 And a lot of it for me
 Right?
 So I think: okay
 And I start a play
 And he somehow knows
 'Cause right away
 It's drrring!
 Hiya, buddy
 Wanna write a show?
 Got a great idea
 We'll own all the rights
 With a two-week out
 And a turnaround
 On the guarantee
 Plus a gross percent
 Of the billing clause
 And there I am in California
 Talking deals and turning pink
 Back in business and I mean just that
 Back with Franklin Shepard, Inc.
 Very sneaky how it happens
 Much more sneaky than you think
 Start with nothing but a song to sing
 Next you're Franklin Shepard-
 Wait a second, wait
 I'm getting in too deep here
 Franklin, let me ask you-
 See, Frank and I are not that kind of close
 Not like we used to be
 And a friendship is like a garden
 You have to water it and tend it and care about it
 And you know what?
 I miss it
 And I want it back
 Look
 Nothing permanent has happened
 Just a temporary kink
 Friendship's something you don't really lose
 Ladies and gentleman
 Don't let me lose the greatest composer any lyricist ever had
 Phone him!
 Write him!
 Stop him on the street!
 You'll recognize him
 He's the one going through his checkbook
 And tell that man to get back to his piano
 Very sneaky how it happens
 Every day you're on the brink
 First the prizes, then the interviews
 Oh, my God! I think it's happened!
 Stop me quick before I sink
 One more triumph that I can't refuse
 In case you didn't notice
 This is my first time on TV, and my last!
 No, here's the point
 Whatever happens
 Then we'll all go have a drink
 That's the guy I love
 The fella who's inside
 Mutter mutter mutter mutter quick, Jerome
 Get the president
 There's a crazy man
 On my TV screen
 Inside
 Bzzz! Bzzz! Drrring!
 Inside
 Franklin Shepard-
 Just write him care of any bank, U.S.A.
 Inc.!