Told You

I am World class
 I'm a pain in the ass
 Enters the chimp with a lit match
 And a bottle of gas
 Thumbs grey with ash
 And a bag of stamp, black
 With resin on my hand
 I infer myself from reactions of people around
 Wake up from a lay in to a hard day
 Of pacing the floor
 Each door supposes a future self
 Behind which, tell me, does history not eat itself alive?
 I'm blind
 Half blind
 No, I'm not blind at all
 It's not 'when will he learn'
 But 'when will he act on it'
 The mad cat just made off with the stash
 Resculpting my tash
 Just to hide the fact my cheeks are fat
 I illuminate my poetry by phone light past midnight
 Lighter fluid to blindside prying
 History is for the winners
 Even the fact that I would think that makes me sigh
 Burn all my books literally the second that I die
 I like my head with heads pinned
 Count the days without sin
 Start again tomorrow just to reach the fabled one
 I really have been something else
 In pursuit my highest self
 The silver spoon worked its way clean out of my mouth
 The townsfolk sharpen their pitchfork
 Just to chase me out of town
 I never get why my career couldn't start and stick around
 I never understand when people actually like my songs
 I never understand why we all just play along
 There's a deity and a chimpanzee waging a war in me
 Little do they know
 My ambivalence just took the back door
 My ambitions are pure
 Or purely cos it felt good
 But when it opens like a rosebud
 I'm the first to say it's God
 I still wake up with my soul sat like a crone on my oesophagus
 That didn't stop me though
 The verdict didn't change a thing
 The doctor says I'm 'probably fine'
 But I know sometimes I'm burning alive
 Ambitions pure
 Or purely cos I wanted to
 Or sometimes just to see what happens when I do
 Or sometimes just to test if the people who love me still would
 Oh, my history's drenched through like a whore
 I didn't have enough lives just to give myself to every one
 But find myself fumbling at this one
 Just for things to do
 And in creation like love or songs
 The noise reached a fever pitch and I couldn't stop it if I tried
 My parents are looking older
 I hate the fucking television
 But every screen's the same
 Bah bah goes the train
 I'm the centre of existence and I'm bound to the tube
 I live in the recesses my ego abides
 Man, it's as big as the moon
 Remember I told you
 Burn all my books literally the second that I die
 Burn all my books literally the second that I die
 This is all history is