Vanilla (I'm Not Sexy) [Live]

I'm not sexy, but I really want to be
 I hear that's normal for my demographic
 I don't look good in skirts, and even wedges hurt my feet
 And I can't keep a straight face and say 'orgasmic'
 Oh, I'm not hip, but I really want to be
 All the bands I like you've heard of, and I watch too much TV
 And I'm not cute, and I think too hard to be sweet
 But not enough to get a real job or converse insightfully –
 This is the part where you politely disagree.
 My virtues are too dull to entertain,
 but you can always count on me.
 A nicely balanced budget's not so thrilling,
 and courtesy's outdated, and sobriety is lame
 Reliability is not appealing
 But I don't know any other way to be
 I love people and I want them to love me
 My virtues are vanilla at best, but you can always call on...
 I'll sing for you, I'll sing for you
 I'll be the first one by your side
 And the last one to leave
 I'll give you everything I've got,
 I'll get you anything you need
 I'm not much to entertain,
 But you can always call on me
 I'm sorry I'm not meaner
 I'm sorry I don't bite
 I'm sorry I don't break as many hearts as you might like
 I'm not hip or cute or spontaneous,
 And I know I'm such a fool,
 But I'll love you real good if you'll let me make
 a dumb mistake or two. Oh,
 I'm not sexy, but I'll love you if you let me...
 My baby took me out one Saturday night,
 and I could tell he could tell I'm a square
 I asked him, 'baby, where are we goin'?'
 and he said, 'apparently nowhere.'
 He said-a 'you don't bark and you don't bite,
 so what use have I got for you?'
 I said, 'my crimes may not be half so entertaining as yours,
 but let me tell you baby what I can do...
 I'll sing for you, I'll sing for you
 I'll be the first one by your side
 And the last one to leave
 I'll give you everything I've got,
 I'll get you anything you need
 I'm not much to entertain,
 But you can always call on me
 Not sexy, no, not sweet, but I'll sing for you if you want me to...
 Not hip, not cute, not sweet, not even solvent baby
 But I love you, oh
 I love you, I love you, I love you baby