Mr. Stupid

If I say what's on my mind, dear
 The judge will slap me down
 You've got me in the corner
 And it's only the second round
 So I'll keep my mouth shut, darling
 I'll be quiet as a lamb
 And I'll act just as dumb, dear
 As you really think I am
 I'll shake your hand like a 'Rang Utan
 Be as goofy as a clown
 Clear the streets and book your seats
 Mr. Stupid's Back In Town
 Have you seen me shoot
 right through that hoop
 It's a trick of great renown
 Bring the crowd and laugh out loud
 Mr. Stupid's back in town
 When your friends point out
 you're stuck with
 A Neanderthal for an ex
 Don't fret about it, darling
 I still sign my name on cheques
 I can grunt my way through questions
 I can scratch myself and howl
 I can numb you with my dumbness
 I can lay it on with a trowel
 On your 37th birthday
 When he handed you that mink
 Did you still feel like a victim
 With your elbows in the sink
 But I've said too much already
 Now I think I'll step aside
 'Cos my alter ego's ready
 For any questions on your mind