Fairytale

Cinderella's on her bedroom floor
 She's got a crush on the guy at the liquor store
 'Cause Mr. Charming don't come home any more
 And she forgets why she came here
 And sleeping Beauty's in a foul mood for shame
 She says, "None for you, dear Prince, I'm tired today
 I'd rather sleep my whole life away
 Than have you keep me from dreaming"
 'Cause I don't care for your fairy tales
 You're so worried 'bout the maiden
 Though you know she's only waiting
 On the next best thing
 Next best thing
 Snow White is doing dishes again
 'Cause what else could you do with seven itty-bitty men?
 Sends them to bed and she calls up a friend
 Says, "Would you meet me at midnight?", oh
 The tall blond lets out a cry of despair
 Says, "Would've cut it myself if I knew men could climb hair
 I'll have to find another tower somewhere
 And keep away from the windows"
 'Cause I don't care for your fairy tales
 You're so worried 'bout the maiden
 Though you know she's only waiting
 On the next best thing
 Next best thing
 Once upon a time in a far-away kingdom
 Man made up a story, said that I should believe him
 Go and tell your white knight that he's handsome in hindsight
 But I don't want the next best thing
 So I sing, I hold my head down
 And I break these walls 'round me
 Can't take no more
 Of your fairytale love
 I don't care for your fairy tales
 You're so worried 'bout the maiden
 Though you know she's only waiting on the next best thing
 I don't care (I don't care)
 I don't care (I don't care)
 You're worried 'bout the maiden
 Though you know she's only waiting
 Spent her whole life being graded
 On the sanctity of patience
 And a dumb appreciation
 But the story needs some mending
 And a better happy ending
 'Cause I don't want the next best thing
 No, no, I don't want the next best thing