Howdy Doody

:
 Got a bottle full of mescal, couple of whores
 A Colt .45 pistol tucked in my shorts
 Drunk in the morn', I puked up my guts on the floor
 Passed out, now I gotta go look for my horse
 Yeah, I tied him up by the general store
 Between the OK Corral and the federal court
 I was in the Birdcage with a peach of a hand
 Must of heard us all shootin', got spooked and he ran
 Ike Clanton came walkin' in, clutchin' his flames
 Got up in his face and told him that's just my game
 Play for blood, capisce?
 Yeah, I'm way too drunk so I carry two guns punk, one for each
 Pull the smoke wagon out, wave it and blaze
 Guess I gotta make a few folks famous today
 Oh well, that's what it is when you live in this town
 Whistle at me if you see my horse walkin' around
 And say:
 Hey, Howdy Doody what's new?
 You might think I'm livin' life like a movie, it's true
 You can find me in a wild west grimy saloon
 Gettin' live, drinkin' moonshine out of a boot
 Yeah, so take a couple back
 Kick your spurs in the dirt
 Make a move and we hit the first person that smirk
 One for the road before we tear the place to bits
 I'm markin' my spot cowboy, you're takin' a trip
 :
 He had a scar on his face and like to sip on the worm
 And quit his job and his shirt filled with cigarette burns
 What a jerk, he's a slob, lipstick and a perm
 That's when heard "click click" and the chicken {eeerer!}
 So I grab my slingshot and duck right under the table
 He untucked and started sprayin' rounds like Halo
 Said, "Move and I'll put your brain in your sleeve"
 That's when I pulled out my lucky nickel and aimed for the knees
 Huh
 Hit the floor and painfully screamed
 Bullets hit the ceiling, now the place is rainin' debris
 He couldn't see so I kicked the gun right outta his hand
 Local hero does it again, hooray for the team
 Singin'
 :
 Hey, Howdy Doody what's new?
 You might think I'm livin' life like a movie, it's true
 You can find me in a wild west grimy saloon
 Gettin' live, drinkin' moonshine out of a boot
 Yeah, so take a couple back
 Kick your spurs in the dirt
 Make a move and we hit the first person that smirk
 One for the road before we tear the place to bits
 I'm markin' my spot cowboy, you're takin' a trip