Hey John Wayne

The mighty grunion
 are rising up and storming the beach
 and on the toll road
 the trolls are slipping out of their leash
 Hey, John Wayne
 it's good to see you
 when I get off the plane
 Your bronze skin has turned pale
 He says, "Pilgrim, tell me how did I fail?"
 On Fascist Island
 the reservoir is taking a leak
 The money boys and boy toys
 are sexually reaching their peak
 Hey, John Wayne
 we can't get credit
 and we're feeling your pain
 Mother Marion says "My hands are bleeding
 and I wish I were dead!"
 Coming down with
 deep neurosis
 carcinoma
 ketosis
 It's the Big C
 for my Sharona
 We got that O.C.
 melanoma
 Hey, John Wayne,
 we never meant
 to take your name in vain
 He says "It's too late
 I guess I'll always be your patron saint"
 So please release us
 put back the pieces
 heal our diseases
 extend our leases
 The well has run dry
 We need a tough guy
 We need a dead eye
 to save us from the mess that we're in
 Hey John
 Hey John Wayne
 Hey Duke!
 A majestic mighty warrior
 is rising up and storming the beach...