Where Is My Light?

l wanted to be sure
 Of horizons in my window, big and clear
 And the sun still making singing in my ear
 But l forgot the wall is always there
 And now l sit in idle blankness
 And a stillness l can't take
 So l began to think in figures
 lnstead of beauty that we've made
 And beauty's gone
 A liar spit in my ear
 And it turned me into nothingness, worms and fear
 The lie became my body, every pore
 As puddles form beneath me, acid sore
 And where is joy among these pieces
 That we scream into the space?
 Where is my gentle reason
 And the light within my cave?
 Where have you been?
 l want to know the quiet
 Of it's voice before the screams
 Just sitting in the silence
 And waiting, waiting
 Where is my light?
 Not blue but green and quiet in my mind?