For the Record

For the record, this is self-destructive
 For the record, I'm aware of that
 For the record, I've been picturing her body
 Draped over the sofa wearing nothing but her hat
 For the record
 I'm screwed
 For the record, this can still go my way
 For the record, I can keep my pride
 All I have to do is keep us focused on the questions
 Each one of her responses will remind me how she lied
 That's the answer
 That's what I'll do
 I'll use the 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 As a lifeline
 And of course I have sympathy
 For the pathological liar who did this to me
 And yes, I admit
 I wish I could touch her
 But the questions will make one thing clear
 There's nothing left of my old life to spare
 No matter how much I may...
 Ta-da!
 What's up?
 What do you think?
 About what?
 My jersey, go SeaWolves!
 Yeah, huh, go SeaWolves, anyway
 I was just, uh, setting the table here
 Oh
 I don't know why I did that, that's weird
 It makes perfect sense to me
 It's kinda like a weird first date
 Which is why we really ought to have more booze
 I have whiskey, but, um, did you, did you want wine?
 Do you have wine?
 Yeah
 The glass shattered on the chiller
 Last night but I think the reds are okay
 I'll just, uh, yeah, I'll get 'em
 I'll be right back
 Stay with Judith, Henry
 Hey, Henry
 I can't imagine all the horrible stuff you've heard about me
 Well, it's all true
 You don't seem like the kind of duck who holds a grudge
 You're not a whiskey drinker, are you?
 No, you keep your wits about you
 I like that
 For the record, I did not expect this
 I really thought that it would be a harder sell
 I came up with this plan at 4 a.m. on Interstate 10
 How was I to know that it would work so well?
 For the record
 I haven't thought a lot about the way I'll answer
 I guess I'm still afraid that I might lie
 If only I could make him see, if I was given the choice
 Of telling him the truth or sticking knives into my eyes
 I'd pick the knives
 But I'll survive
 I'll treat the 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 As a passtime
 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 Just like last time
 And maybe it's wrong to say
 But his defense and distance will not sway
 Me from believing this is possible
 If he didn't love me anymore
 Then why the hell did he open the front door?
 I think it's a sign that he–
 Hey
 What's up?
 There's a good chance that this wine is terrible
 I– I'd settle for drinkable
 I make no promises, oh, you lit candles
 Yeah, I thought it would help set the mood
 What's "the mood"?
 Hopeful?
 Just like our first date
 When we sat on your carpet
 Drank two bottles of wine
 This is different
 Two years have gone by
 My whole life was a lie
 But there's something that feels so familiar
 We've been here before
 Staring at each other
 Suddenly caring for each other
 Moving on to
 Question two
 ♪
 "Would you like to be famous? In what way?"
 We're asking 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 To each other
 Tonight's 36 reasons why you and I cannot be
 Healthy for each other
 We're asking 36, 36, 36, 36 questions tonight
 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 For the second time
 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 For the last time
 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 For the last time
 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 For the last time
 36, 36, 36, 36 questions
 For the last time
 36, 36, 36, 36
 This will be the last thing