Relapse Into Sickness

Once within the chaotic maze I'm lost forlorn
 Crushed in dejection by a whole host of possibilities
 I followed whispers suffocating in the gloom
 Gurgling like blood through a slit throat
 I followed in silence amid twisting halls
 Only just iridescent of fading specks of light
 Consumed and put out by tears that blood has shed
 All around losing substance giving way to numbness
 Where in others what springs is fear of the unknown
 In essence irrational but still hard to subjugate
 Bleak prospect of finding any sense at all
 Betrayed from the start by my very nature
 Fruit of centuries of regenerating in suppression
 Absurd inhibitions shackled higher insurrection
 Incoherent ideas sculpted to spread dismay and guilt
 For crimes that aren't, in my core I seek to ravish
 Lapsing in lower state while drifting in a sea of languor
 Demise is all I can perceive among this horde
 Vacillating like tired birds amid ferocious hail
 Sipping untold mystery diseased born of fear
 Raping dispoiling whatever pure still stands
 Adulterated by slithering concealed snakes
 Sinuously in motion allure to feeble emotion
 Envenomed dragged to the brink of resignation
 Life allure to the hopeless herd grazing in envenomed fields
 Lost in a path littered by virtuous truths of doubt
 Bound by gregarious existence based upon perversion
 Castrated ideals set my inside ablaze
 Upon facing the golden age of filth
 Pervaded with every kind of shit
 Where subhuman mongoloid scum
 Thrive engaging in boundaries perversion
 Orgiastic culture of death fruit of our own making
 Upon abject liars I vomit this visceral gush of aversion
 Sought for domination I'm none's to bleed
 Never shall I feed greed with pain and fear
 Cut me open pull me inside out but I shall never bleed
 All around me weather before hateful eyes
 Bonds of affection are no more than frail twigs
 Bound to be shattered in the midst of violent gales
 Gales of hate where's there's no life
 Veins vigorously pumping blood infused in abhorrence
 While malevolence brews within my soulless heart
 Intrinsic hatred voraciously eating me out
 Lost and destined to dwell were no life dwells
 Dead inside now choking on my own lies
 Death becomes the only concrete reality