Nine Months

The first thing you said the night we met is I was beautiful
 And you were right, that New Year's night I looked so beautiful
 So good inside, life in my eyes, I was so beautiful
 That's the last time I looked so beautiful
 'Cause now I'm standing in your light, and it's not beautiful
 But I was so beautiful, I was so beautiful
 But now I'm sleeping, just so I'm not awake
 When I get up, I'm getting dressed by yesterday
 And every time I think of you
 I hate I didn't run away
 'Cause I never thought, I never thought
 I'd be the girl who stayed
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 In late July, we went upstate for your twenty-second
 All you wanted for your birthday's to mess with my head
 Tell me I'm dumb, all my friends suck, I'll never be loved again
 Then apologize, say it's not what you meant
 Ah, but it's what you said, I know it's what you meant
 So now I'm sleeping, just so I'm not awake
 When I get up, I'm getting dressed by yesterday
 And every time I think of you
 I hate I didn't run away
 'Cause I never thought, I never thought
 I'd be the girl who stayed
 But when I think of it, I acted like a kid
 Not knowing right from wrong
 It makes my stomach sick
 That I tolerated you for so long
 It's all so clear to me now
 That you're not here with me, how was I so blind
 The words "It's not my fault" repeat until I fall asleep each night
 The words "It's not my fault" repeat until I fall asleep each night
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 So when they ask you about us
 No, don't you ever say we were in love
 I took my time now I know what it was
 So don't you ever say we were in love
 You ruined my life for nine fucking months
 So don't you ever say we were in love
 No, don't you ever say we were in love
 No, don't you ever say we were in love