Romance

My girlfriend, wants me be a better person, so I can get a better girlfriend.
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 Whenever I meet a pretty girl, whenever I meet a pretty girl.
 The first thing I look for is intelligence, because if she doesn't have that, then she's mine.
 Couple of months ago I gave my girlfriend some fancy???.
 She actually got mad at me...
 Say Anthony I think this is more of a gift for you than it is for me...
 and I said well, if you wanna get technical, It was originally a gift for my last girlfriend.
 Happy Valentine's Day.
 Giving gifts is tough in any relationship I assume...
 Like this past Christmas, I kept telling my girlfriend from months in advance, months.
 Baby all I want from you this year is an X-Box, that's it.
 Begginning and end of list, X-Box.
 You know what she got me?
 A homemade frame with a picture of us from our first date together.
 Which was fine...
 Because I got her an X-Box.
 I should've got her a chocolate.
 My girlfriend loves the chocolate.
 She's always eating chocolate, she likes to joke she's got a chocolate addiction.
 Like "
 Keep me away from those chocolate bars Anthony!
 I'm addicted to them!" And it is really annoying.
 So I put her in a car, and took her downtown.
 And I pointed out a crack addict and I said "
 You see that honey?
 Why can't you be that skinny?" You guys seem like nice people, I don't wanna sound like a jerk here, but that joke usually gets a standing ovation.