The Information Man

After over 300, 000 miles
 12 dozen breakdowns, nervous
 One too many midnights and a bunch of broken laws later
 I have come here from out of the rain and into this rest area
 Caught, 22 miles between you and me watching the Information Man
 Behind his Information Booth, juggling predictable conversation
 With folks who look like iceberg lettuce and who believe that somehow
 The flat lines of small talk will give us life
 I want them to leave
 Like a big deal orchestra removing itself from the stringed section
 So I can fiddle with fate and make music
 There is a distance the size of bravery
 It forms like words in the mouth of a baby
 Reaching out for the point where all things meet
 On one end of it sits an Information Man
 Who I imagine holds down his second job as church bartender
 Behind locked doors, leading to the bell tower we are not allowed see
 On the other end of this space
 I am standing like shoe polish on an overstocked shelf
 Hoping that one day someone will pick me to make things better
 This is not a showdown or a shootout, we are not facing off
 But I can feel the rumble between dusk and dawn
 As if the chance to come clean with myself will be outlawed unless I relax
 I have heard, that if you pull a bent breath
 Through the second hole of a harmonica
 Tuned to the key of Georgia
 While a train moves by on the tail end of dusk
 There is a good chance you will finally know what it means to rest
 I have not yet rested
 It takes a long time to make love with someone who hates themselves
 It feels like I've been standing here for exactly that long
 When at last, the rain outside drops off
 And takes everyone in the rest area with it
 Except for me and the Information Man
 If we were created in God's image, then when God was a child
 He smushed fire ants with his finger tips and avoided tough questions
 There are ways around being the go-to person, even for ourselves
 But tonight we will get the answer, and you know what I'm talking about
 The Answer
 Emphasis on E, Answer
 So I put my best foot forward
 And take the kind of deep breath that gives me away
 As someone who deals with anxiety and odd numbers
 Every other
 Other every minute
 In between it, the Info Guy's eyes grab me then shift
 Back and forth
 Like mopping floors with the sweat I sweat in battles against myself
 He's got me locked in and is smiling
 If you've never been rocked back by the presence of purpose
 This poem is too soon for you
 Return to your mediocrity
 Plug it into an amplifier
 And rethink yourself
 Because some of us are on fire for the answer
 I am ready for rejection and rebirthing balance in my stutter steps
 When the Info Guy finally pipes up
 Like C.R. Avery on a piano box
 And says to me:
 I can tell you're looking for answers
 In the same way I can see when Kenny Rogers is out of aces
 So for a taste of your whiskey I'll give you some advice
 (Laughs)
 I'm just fucking with you
 You're not allowed to have alcohol here, man
 It's a rest area
 Listen
 If I didn't have so much of this life all wrong
 I would have gotten it right by now
 I talk a whole bunch, but I really know only a few things
 So I'm not saying to follow along verbatim here
 I'll just tell ya the things I tell myself
 The things I know
 And you can see what sticks
 I know our shoes were stitched from songs about highways
 The best songs are the ones about Georgia
 Even though I've never been there it's the only place I still believe in Jesus
 I know that no matter what it is you believe in
 You've got to spare yourself the futility of making fun of God
 Because that guy hasn't even talked
 Ever
 I know troubleshooting yourself in the foot
 And acting as your own universe is a tricky dichotomy to deal with
 But, yes, you are the center of the universe
 If you weren't you wouldn't be here
 So as the middle of space, and everything floating in it
 It is your job to know that the emptiness is just emptiness
 That the stars are stars
 And that the flying rocks hurt
 So please, stop inviting walls into wide open spaces
 I know everything is out there
 It's why they call it everything
 I know there are times
 When you will lay your head to rest
 And have a moment of brilliance
 That will grow into a perfect order of words
 But you will fall asleep instead of painting it down on paper
 When you wake up you will have forgotten the idea completely
 And miss it like a front tooth
 But at least you know how to recognize moments of brilliance
 Because even at your worst you are fucking incredible
 It comes honest
 So return to yourself even if you're already there
 Because no matter where you go
 Or how hard you try
 Or what you do
 The only person you're ever going get to be
 And I know it
 Thank God
 Is you