After Midnight

Sometimes the voices can't be hushed
 They force me to remember all the pain and death I've pushed
 So many times I've catered for my lustful need
 I finished sobbing then looked back - an angel lies in demon seed
 In ecstasy reborn
 Oh those crossed out eyes on beauty torn
 After midnight, calling of the small hours
 My inner peace is sacrificed to bloody truth
 At least it seems that this it what it means
 'Cause the need for fucking absolution justifies the means
 A simple plan that's fantasized by man
 In all the crudest ways I beg and long for harmony, in vain
 It feels like ages since those times
 I can't bear it anymore, the cries to answer for my crimes
 In all the madness just a bit of clarity prevails
 I hurl myself, up the stairs, to even out Justice's scales
 To the tower's top I creep
 The garret window my destination may the final leap grant peaceful sleep
 After midnight, calling of the small hours
 My inner peace is sacrificed to bloody truth
 At least it seems that this it what it means
 'Cause the need for fucking absolution justifies the means
 A simple plan that's fantasized by man
 In all the crudest ways I beg and long for harmony, in vain
 I tiptoe shaking to the glass
 and take a look how far down till I kiss the devil's arse
 I undress, in distress to serve this final mess.
 No self-flagellation will suffice, it's blood for blood and nothing less.
 I down a poisoned chalice, slit my wirsts, once and for all!
 Yank open the window, step to the ledge and plunge into my saving fall!
 I wake up, soaked in sweat, my heart still pounding in despair.
 I cough and vomit, drenched in tears, still feeling the grip of this nightmare!
 But as I look around, I see them gathered, all white and pale.
 With empty eyes and open mouths they grasp at me to end my tale!