You Should Be Hated Here

They're all surrounding
 we're both hoping
 failing slowly
 attempting one thing:
 to stand up,
 with dignity,
 to walk away
 Due to the time it took to prove it all (never thought that I could do anything right)
 the new lines 'round my eyes (but I don't mean to say that you were wrong)
 you'll know the scars upon my head
 were only meant to spell apologies
 There's a ten point deer that someone said (this night is guaranteed to all turn black)
 was impossible to find until (with memories that haunt the past)
 you find it on the freeway standing stupid looking blind
 I'm only here to fall apart
 you've been angry from the start
 but I know these trainwrecks happen all the time
 And everything that no one knows
 you should be hated here by now
 this was the prettiest lie that I told tonight
 it's been the prettiest lie that I told all year
 the unmade bed inside the room (It could be now)
 where I don't feel comfortable at all (and I don't feel proud)
 where the blanket stared at me for hours (I'm so sorry now)
 and I stared right back so self-righteously (I'm sorry now)
 And it all comes down to composure that's been lost
 when it all comes down to composure that's been lost