The Clown

Man, there was this clown
 And he was a real happy guy, a real happy guy
 He had all these greens and all these yellows
 And all these oranges bubbling around inside of him
 And he had just one thing he wanted in this world
 He just wanted to make people laugh
 That's all he wanted out of this world
 He was a real happy guy
 Let me tell you about this clown
 He used to raise a sweat every night out on that stage
 And just wouldn't stop
 That's how hard he worked
 He was trying to make people laugh
 He used to have this cute little gimmick
 Where he had a seal follow him up and down a step-ladder
 Blowing "Columbia, the Gem of the Ocean" on a
 B-flat Sears Roebuck Model 1322 A plastic bugle
 A real cute act
 But they didn't laugh
 Ah, you know, a few little things here and there, but not really
 And he was booking out in all these tank towns
 Playing the Rotary Club, and the Kiwanis Club
 And the American Legion Hall
 And he just wasn't making it
 And he had all these wonderful things going on inside of him
 All these greens and yellows and all these oranges
 He's a real happy guy
 And all he wanted to do was to make these people laugh
 That's all he wanted out of this world is to make people laugh
 And then something began to grow
 Something that just wasn't good began to grow inside of this guy
 You know, it's a funny thing
 Something began to trouble this clown
 You know little things, little things once in a while would happen
 That would make that crowd begin to move
 But they were never the right things
 Like for example the time the seal got sick on the stage
 All over the stage
 The crowd just, just broke up, you know, little things like that
 And they weren't supposed to be in the act
 And they weren't supposed to be funny
 This began to trouble him, and it bothered him
 This little thing began to grow inside
 All those greens and all those oranges, all those yellows
 They just weren't as bright as they used to be
 And all he wanted to do was to make that crowd laugh
 That's all he wanted to do
 There was this one night in Dubuque
 When he was playing this Rotary Club
 All these dentists, and all these druggists
 All these postmen sitting around
 And they were a real cold bunch, nothing was happening
 He was leaving the stage when he stumbled over his ladder
 And fell flat on his face, just flat on his face!
 When he stands up he's got this bloody nose
 He looks out at the crowd and that crowd is just rolling on the floor
 He's just knocked them flat out!
 This begins to trouble him even more
 And he begins to see something, he begins to see something
 And right about here things began to change, but really change
 Not the least of which our clown changes his act
 Bought himself a set of football pads
 A yellow helmet with red stripes
 Hired a girl who dropped a five-pound sack of flour on his head
 Every night
 From maybe twenty feet up
 Oh man, what a bit, that just broke 'em up every night
 But not like Dubuque
 And all those colors
 All those yellows, all those reds, all those oranges
 A lot of gray in there now, a lot of blue
 And all he wanted to do was to make this crowd laugh
 That's all he wanted out of this world
 They were laughing alright
 Not like Dubuque, but they were laughing
 And the dough started to come in
 He was playing the big towns
 Chicago, Detroit
 And then it was Pittsburgh one night
 Real fine town, Pittsburgh, you know
 About three-quarters way through his act, a rope broke
 Down came the backdrop, right on the back of the neck
 And he went flat
 And something broke
 This was it
 It hurt way down deep inside
 He tried to get up
 He looked out at the audience
 And you should've, man you should've, you should've seen that crowd
 They was rolling in the aisles
 This was bigger than Dubuque
 This was bigger than Dubuque!
 He really had 'em going
 But this was it
 This was the last one
 This was the last one
 Yeah
 This was the last one
 He knew now
 Man, he really knew now!
 But it was too late
 And all he wanted was to make this crowd laugh
 Well, they were laughing
 But now he knew
 That was the end of the clown
 And you should have seen the bookings coming in
 Man, his agent was on the phone for twenty-four hours
 The Palladium, MCA, William Morris
 But it was too late
 He really knew now!
 He really knew
 He really knew now
 William Morris sends regrets