Inner Thoughts (Honesty)

Can I give you all that you need?
 We're spendin' the nights runnin' free
 (This one hurts me)
 I'm holdin' my words so we can be here
 (I always keep it in, always)
 Stridin' through life (Not today), I can see
 Headphones on for the train ride
 Silence, it tears through my bones
 There's a whole train car full of people
 We all just stared at our phones
 Five thousand friends on my socials
 But for some reason, I still feel alone
 I've lived here my whole damn life
 But at the same time, well, I've never been home
 If I could I would stop my head from these thoughts
 That bounce off the wall 'til I'm droppin' dead
 But I ignored what the doctor said
 And got better on my own, I don't need you to cop me meds
 No mind, so my brain feels lost
 I thank God that my soul's been found
 Now I'm givin' you the real damn me
 Now I'm never gonna stop this sound
 'Cause these days, rather help you up
 Than to sit there and let you down
 'Cause I'd much rather help you swim
 Than sit there and sink while I Iet you drown
 Said I'm back on my real shit
 Back now and I'm back with the fire
 I'm back with the back to backs
 I won't stop 'til my mum's out of work and my fam can retire
 It's real man shit, come and they go
 Yeah, I know there's a chance it'll hurt
 My brother, what makes you a man
 Is the way that a man puts his family first
 It's easy to take what's yours
 It'd be much harder to give
 Everybody works hard for themselves
 A real man works hard for his (Argh)
 Can I give you all that you need?
 We're spendin' the nights runnin' free
 I'm holdin' my words so we can be here
 (This some real shit)
 Stridin' through life, I can see
 My best friends turned strangers
 I learnt that my love was a lie
 I just don't think I could face it
 Thank God that my brother's alive
 One of them still never made it
 It's a pain that I suffer at times
 And I know that he's up there with Teta
 And that Teta's sippin' that scotch in the sky
 I swear that the whole world's crazy
 No respect, and the whole world's lazy
 The one girl that I love still hates me
 And I wish that we kept my baby
 I'm not proud of the man I've become
 Lost good friends to the grams of the drugs
 I'm tryin' to swim on the moonlight, argh
 I wanna dance on the sun
 I wanna hold hands with my son but I can't
 Wanna put hands on the gun
 And cock back and drop the clip to my brain
 And lay there in pain with a handful of blood
 All of my homies act like they don't know me, they're actually close
 In the end, all my friends disappeared through the years
 Like they Casper the Ghost
 I get stuck in a train of thought, where I can't feel pain at all
 Praise the Lord that I still be alive
 But at times, I would die, and I'd give back my life
 Just to make sure my baby's born
 Stuck in a train of thought, where I can't feel pain at all
 Praise the Lord that I still be alive
 But at times, I would die, and I'd give back my life
 Just to make sure my baby's born
 Can I give you all that you need?
 We're spendin' the nights runnin' free