How Do You Milk A Cow

Yeah I was always the lazy one,
 A Southern Californian,
 But I've got some kinfolk on the Mason-Dixon line.
 So this summer just for fun
 Hopped in my DeLorean
 And headed for my uncle's farm for a short time.
 I thought that I would be huntin' and fishin'.
 I misunderstood him somehow.
 So far there's nothin' but chores here to mention.
 I didn't mind feedin the sows.
 But HOW DO YOU MILK A COW?
 How do you milk a cow?
 I wasn't in FFA.
 This cow must think i'm crazy
 Up under it this way.
 I'm sittin' here a pullin', but there ain't nothin' comin' out.
 Oh E I E I O...
 How do you milk a cow?
 Yeah I love it here in Tennesse,
 But these farmers all make fun of me.
 Can't haul much hay in a tiny sports car.
 So I got myself a 4 wheel drive,
 Learned to spotlight deer at night,
 And I've got shearin' sheep right down to an art.
 One thing's for sure,
 I hate shovelin' manure,
 It gets all over my overalls.
 Them horses need shoein'
 I hear Bessie mooin'.
 So I thought maybe I'd ask you all.
 HOW DO YOU MILK A COW?
 How do you milk a cow?
 I think it's safe to say
 A man could get arrested for this in LA
 This heifer must be empty 'cause she ain't puttin out.
 Oh E I E I O,
 Tell me how do you milk a cow.
 (Spoken)
 This song is absolutely an "udder" disaster.
 I hope I don't get mad cow diease.
 How do you milk a cow?
 I no longer care.
 I'm gettin sick and tired of smellin' dairy air.
 I'm headin' back to Cali
 And I'm turnin' in my plow.
 Oh E I E I O.
 How do you milk a cow?