Of Eating Disorders and Restraining Orders

The euphoria of vomit coats my teeth
 And again I dream of chewing
 Away the umbilicus
 To a universe I've never felt an attachment to
 Thoughts drift to a world
 Steeped in carcass char and napalm tar
 Miasmal reek of a world worth living in
 Time immemorial my only ally
 In a world draped in deceit
 When that time arrives
 It will commemorate this world
 Being facefucked
 And left to rot in the ashes
 Of the fetus hope left on the table
 The afterbirth left behind from this postmenstrual abortion
 "I am not lost. I know exactly where I am, I am in some shitty fucking Hell which is exactly what I deserve. But YOU, YOU are lost. All my life I thought I needed you, that I couldn't survive without you... fuck, FUCK. It was the other fucking way around. It was the other way around."
 It's what makes me lose sleep at night
 Not the morally incongruent concepts
 Of wrong and right
 For they both lie at odds
 And that disparity is a chasm
 As it came together it shall also fall apart
 Burned temples of diseased fleshly dominion
 Irradiated with the flames of desire
 Shooting syringes made of filed-down bones
 Injecting the filth left from our subconscious minds
 Stemming from our previous lives
 All that encompasses you is all that distresses me