Drunk Dial (feat. Murs & Grieves)

Operator here's my dime
 Connect me please
 I know that she's at home
 It's four o-clock on a Sunday morning
 Who the hell is calling my phone?
 Waking me up I'm stretching and yawning
 If you had any sense you'd leave me alone
 Wee hours of the morning and word is bond
 I'm in jail I need bail. Again, the word is bond
 Not James in a tux with olives draped on my cup
 With a dame all on me with healthy letters to cup
 So what up?
 Can you free me 'fore my prints get back?
 And they run em through the system and realize that I'm black
 All I remember was the stripper then I faded to rack
 Said her name was December than she sat on my lap
 "Merry Crimmuh"
 Liquor and higher power my witness
 I thought fleeing The People was just a matter of fitness
 With all these nice drinks, compliments of Dennis
 Whoever the fuck that is
 "Dennis is this!"
 Two middle fingers up
 "Dennis is this!"
 Dennis tab maxed out on titties and fifths
 Whoever the fuck Dennis, is Dennis is pissed!
 Cus I don't think that dude we was drinking with was Dennis at all, fam!
 It's four o-clock on a Sunday morning
 Who the hell is calling my phone?
 Waking me up I'm stretching and yawning
 If you had any sense you'd leave me alone
 Ha, Yup
 Im aware it's four in the morning
 But I just wanna tell you im drunk and im kinda horny
 I know it gets annoying, but I been losing my grip
 Every woman I talk to I treat like a fair piss and it's a bitch
 Mainly cuz I now consider you one
 I wanna let you go but every time I seem to screw up
 Now that's the problem with the space that you occupy
 It's going great and then the thought of you would cross my mind
 A box of wine and a carton of coffin nails will
 Convince me now would be a great time for hate mailin'
 Like "Hey bitch! How the hell have you been?
 Remember me? We were dating and you slept with my friends!"
 I just thought that I'd remind you in case you ever forget it
 And train yourself to believe that you're not a terrible wretch
 Ha
 You broke my heart into like a million pieces
 So here's another dim-litted picture of my penis
 Whoa!
 What the fuck is going on Grieves
 You saved my number under the wrong name in your phone?
 Is that a picture of your...?
 I'ma pretend I didn't see that
 All that rain got you suicidal up in Seatt... ohhhhh
 You had to much to drink again
 Whiskey and a cellphone ain't never gonna be your friend
 You booze you lose, homie you been warned
 You better off using your cellphone to watch porn
 Grab some lotion & a napkin
 Jack off then pass out
 All these drunk texts'll have you fucked off and ass out
 I hope you black out before you do anymore damage
 I checked your timeline, homie... why you Tweetin in Spanish?
 I understand if this is what you gotta go through
 But when you sober up I got some screenshots to show you
 Grieves, bro trust me
 And you gonna be hella happy that all of them texts didn't go through
 It's four o-clock on a Sunday morning
 Who the hell is calling my phone?
 Waking me up I'm stretching and yawning
 If you had any sense you'd leave me alone
 Ooh! Ahh!
 That's the angle
 *Click*
 She's gonna love that one