Eighteen Weeks

Selfishness is disease
 I hope it won't take me
 I hope it won't break me like it's breaking all my friends
 Any means to an end
 Is it really that fucked up that I'd rather be dead?
 I know this will make me vulnerable
 But I have to know
 Did you ever care more than you showed?
 When you left for 18 weeks
 Did you ever think of me?
 I hope that when you crack a smile
 I fill your headspace for a while
 And if you ever wondered why I'm always scared
 I've seen people change and remain unaware
 Like their loved ones were never there
 I'm reaching out, I wish you cared
 Would you dream of me
 Even when I slip into anxiety?
 Would you believe in me
 Even if it cost you everything?
 Would you dream of me?
 When you sleep
 I hear you calling my name
 The air on your teeth
 When you speak of me
 When you speak of me
 When you left for 18 weeks
 Did you ever think of me?
 I hope that when you crack a smile
 I fill your headspace for a while
 And if you ever wondered why I'm always scared
 I've seen people change and remain unaware
 Like their loved ones were never there
 I'm reaching out, I wish you cared
 Would you dream of me
 Even when I slip into anxiety?
 Would you believe in me
 Even if it cost you everything?
 Would you dream of me?
 When you sleep
 I hear you calling my name
 The air on your teeth
 When you speak of me
 When you speak of me
 ♪
 It's complicated, but I think I'll be fine
 'Cause you can't turn the clock and you can't rewind
 Still jaded, I missed all the signs
 Fly, fly endangered, but with you, it won't fly
 So hold your tongue and let me speak
 When you left, it left me weak
 Let's find out how far I sink
 Tie anchors to my feet
 When you left you for 18 weeks
 Did you ever think of me?
 I hope that when you crack a smile
 I fill your headspace for a while
 And if you ever wondered why I'm always scared
 I've seen people change and remain unaware
 Like their loved ones were never there
 I'm reaching out, I wish you cared