My Meds Aren't Working

My body still clings to life
 Only my spirit has died inside
 I pray for death every night
 But I keep waking up alive
 I cut myself for infliction
 And I still spit at my reflection
 I hate everything I am
 I have my friends to thank for that
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 So I keep taking my meds
 And I do what my doctor says
 I hate myself more everyday
 I guess I'll always be this way
 I've learned that love is dead
 And people just get fucked instead
 And all the while making friends
 Just to fuck them in the end
 Everyone I touch infects me
 Cancer in flesh there is death all around
 Everyone I touch, I infect them
 Black and dead is my heart
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 Alone, I pace and I tear at my skin and my hair
 Burn myself for some relief
 For a sick fucking joke of a life
 The punchline is when I die
 And come back as me for eternity
 Just to fuck up everyday
 And fail the ones that I love by being alive
 I don't know who I am anymore
 A parasite in human disguise?
 Searching for a piece of shit with all of you fucking maggots and flies
 Everyday I feel that I just can't do anything right
 I'm sorry if you know my name
 I'll probably fuck up your life