Book of Doom

"And there he goeth up hence to Bethel
 And he is going in the way
 And the young little youths have come out from the city
 And scoff at him and say unto him
 'Go up bald head, go up thy bald head'
 He looketh behind him and see-eth them
 And declareth them vile in the name of Jehova
 And two bears came out of the forest
 And rendeth them in two..."
 And here's chapter 1
 And I read the instructions
 Scribed upon the page one of the tome
 My mind it be doth wander
 "Write in only red ink and then. Blah blah blah"
 I skip past the instructions
 They're dead boring, I scan the preface
 I leaf straight to the action
 No distraction for me, just
 The Book of Doom
 Now here's chapter 2
 I ignite sacred candles
 I cut into my arm with the quill
 Then I plot your demise
 As I write down your names here 1, 2, 3
 Now your fate is secured
 I have made your outlook look quite grim
 What's this? Something is weird
 In retrospect (and thinking about it) perhaps I should have paid some more attention to
 The Books of Doom
 "This book is property of John Romero."
 "Balls where is it?"
 "I Don't know, you had it!"
 "Is that it?"
 "No."
 Now where's chapter 3?
 Holy crap I have I lost it
 I am sure I put it over there
 That bit's really important
 OH EFF! Where has it gone, where's it gone, gone, gone
 I give up I can't find it
 The Librarian will not be pleased
 Plus my curse is quite ruined
 With frustration I then bin
 The Book of Doom
 "Just a reminder that your book is overdue."
 "Shit!"