She Only Bitches When She Breathes

She said if we got married
 Buy a house and some land
 Pick out our circles of trust
 Those matchin' weddin' bands
 Life would be so sweet
 And I'd treat you oh so nice
 We'll be rollin' in the hay
 Almost every night
 Now one year later
 Honey, I need you to mow the grass, take out the trash
 Put the dishes in the dishwasher
 And for heaven's sake, put the toilet seat down
 She only bitches when she breathes
 Rollin' in the hay upsets her allergies
 Won't wear no sexy lingerie
 Since she ate that wedding cake
 Only thing she blows is my money and dreams
 Yeah this circle of trust is like a band of thieves
 She stole my heart and then my self esteem
 I'll have to sum it up this way
 She could turn a straight man gay
 She only bitches when she breathes
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 She was always smilin'
 Shy in many ways
 She always kept me hangin'
 On every word she'd say
 She was sweeter than honey
 And every man's dream
 She said let's tie the knot
 We'll make the perfect team
 Now one year later
 I work all day just like you do, why don't you wash your own clothes?
 And buy some new underwear, because these won't come clean
 And by the way, not tonight, I have a headache
 She only bitches when she breathes
 Rollin' in the hay upsets her allergies
 Won't wear no sexy lingerie
 Since she ate that wedding cake
 Only thing she blows is my money and dreams
 Yeah this circle of trust is like a band of thieves
 She stole my heart and then my self esteem
 I'll have to sum it up this way
 She could turn a straight man gay
 She only bitches when she breathes
 Yeah she only bitches when she breathes
 Rollin' in the hay upsets her allergies
 Won't wear no sexy lingerie
 Since she ate that wedding cake
 Only thing she blows is my money and dreams
 Yeah this circle of trust is like a band of thieves
 She stole my heart and then my self esteem
 I'll have to sum it up this way
 She could turn a straight man gay
 She only bitches when she breathes
 I'll have to sum it up this way
 She could turn a straight man gay
 She only bitches when she breathes
 Why don't you cook for me anymore?