Living The Dream

Well
 I drink beer and I smoke pot
 And I've thrown punches in a parking lot
 I don't dance but damn, the girls still dance with me
 I've been driven to drink and too drunk to drive
 I'm half in the bed by half past 5
 Hell why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream
 I'm a beer pong champ and a flip cup king
 Who's no longer welcome at the Dairy Queen
 No shoes, no shirt, no more dipped cones for me
 I share wine and wisdom over microwave dinners with the girl I date that I met on Tinder
 I can't call her love but I can call her anytime I want (that's a booty-call)
 'Cause I drink beer and I smoke pot
 And I've thrown punches in a parking lot
 I don't dance but damn, the girls still dance with me
 I've been driven to drink and too drunk to drive
 I'm half in the bed by half past 5
 Hell why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream
 I throw parties on the weekend that are second to none
 Brought to you in part by my college fund
 Keg-stands, 40 hands and neighbors call the cops again
 I only smoke when I drink (yup) but I drink everyday
 My only worry in the world is getting myself laid
 It's a damn near miracle I don't already have a kid
 'Cause I drink beer and I smoke pot
 And I've thrown punches in a parking lot
 I don't dance but damn, the girls still dance with me
 I've been driven to drink and too drunk to drive
 I'm half in the bed by half past 5
 Hell why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream
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 'Cause I drink beer and I smoke pot
 And I've thrown punches in a parking lot
 I don't dance but damn, them girls they still dance with me
 I've been driven to drink and too drunk to drive
 I'm half in the bed by half past 5
 Now why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream
 Well why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream