Socks

Early Christmas morning
 Sneaky as can be
 I creep across the carpet
 And I peek under the tree
 Pick out a gift from Mom to me
 And bring it to my ear
 Give it a little shimmy shake and what do I hear?
 Socks
 (Tuuuuube socks)
 This is the worst gift I ever got
 It doesn't beep or buzz or bop or rattle in the box
 Hey, why'd you waste the paper on a lousy pair of socks?
 Tiptoe to the mantle
 A scowl upon my brow
 I reach up to my stocking
 Hanging from a holly bough
 I reach right in and feel around
 For Santa Claus' loot
 But all I find is something there to insulate my boots
 Socks
 (Kneeeeee high)
 Santa how could you let me down?
 It doesn't slip or slide or spring or make a sound that rocks
 Hey, why'd you stuff my stocking with a lousy pair of socks?
 ♪
 Moms and Dads across the land
 Be careful what you do
 Your girls and boys might ball 'em up and toss 'em back at you
 And next time when ol' Santa comes, and the evening's getting late
 Instead of milk and cookies I may leave upon his plate
 Socks
 (Argyle???)
 This is the worst gift I ever got
 It doesn't beep or buzz or bop or rattle in the box
 Why'd you waste that paper on a lousy pair of socks?