The Chelsea Hotel Oral Sex Song

Walking up 23rd street, I was tired and alone
 It was late and my housemate would be asleep when I got home
 The sign ahead glowing red said The Chelsea Hotel
 Where Nancy and Sid Vicious and my friend Dave once dwelled
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 The street was black under my feet which continued their walking
 Though I was vaguely interested in the folks behind me talking
 Two guys, maybe gay, wearing raver type suits
 And a girl wearing glasses who looked kinda cute
 Her hair was short and curly, she had a tattoo on her back
 Which I could see 'cause her red shirt was sleeveless with straps
 But I only saw this later, not in my first glance
 But I could hear her talking behind me and as if by chance
 She was trying to describe a song I knew well
 Leonard Cohen's song about The Chelsea Hotel
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 And I smiled a smile to myself when she said
 That it's the song where he talks about someone giving him head
 On a bed that's unmade and how the song was outrageous
 And that's when I got uncharacteristically courageous
 I could have left the three of them laughin' and just gone on home
 But I turned and I faced her and I said, "Leonard Cohen?"
 Just like that
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 She was shocked and surprised but she looked very happy
 That she now had a witness to back up her story
 She looked at me with her spectacled eyes
 And said, "See, I told you", to the two others guys
 My tale might have ended right there and then
 But we started talking about Leonard Cohen
 And how his lyrics were cool and how he sang so sincere
 That it must have been true and it happened right here
 And though usually women right off the bat don't find me that great
 But there we were laughing, strolling, like we could really relate
 And though we didn't mention the headline, it was alluded
 And our conversation was better because her friends were not included
 The guys were more into each other, at least that's how it seemed to me
 I heard the faint knocking of opportunity
 Although it's easy for me now upon my looking back
 To think of all the things I could have said to make me the mac
 Just keep the sad truth in mind as I tell this to you
 That we really only talked for a minute or two
 And I never got her name and she never got mine
 But in those couple short minutes, we had a pretty good time
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 And on top of that, though you may not believe it
 Listen to what she says to me next as I repeat it
 That line about getting a blowjob that Leonard sings
 She said it made her want to do naughty things
 And right about then, I should have asked if she knew
 What The Chelsea charged if we got a room for two
 But I didn't and I know I'm a schmuck, don't you doubt it
 The only thing I did was write this stupid song about it
 If I was Leonard Cohen or some other song writing master
 I'd know to first get the oral sex and then write the song after
 You can practice writing songs about romance every day
 But if you haven't loved then you'll have nothing to say
 We could have given each other head on Leonard's same unmade bed
 But I was too shy to suggest it and so instead
 When the three of them stopped to look through a pub window
 I said good night, though I hadn't quite meant to
 And waved as we walked though I wouldn't forget her
 Especially since she mysteriously said, "See you later"
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 So now every time I'm walking, I hope that we'll meet
 And on purpose, I always go up 23rd street
 Where the sign glowing red says The Chelsea Hotel
 Where Nancy and Sid Vicious and my friend Dave once dwelled
 Life doesn't work out the way it does in old songs
 That's why we sing new ones to say what really goes on
 Though if I could her again and we pick up right where it ended
 Maybe I'd play her this song and maybe she wouldn't get too offended
 Now listen here and I'll tell you why
 There's more to this situation than meets the eye
 You may think it's sad, you may think it's pathetic
 That I sing this song and that she'll never know it
 But think a minute about what that means
 And you'll realise it's actually a wonderful thing
 That all around the world, there may be folks singing tunes
 For the love of other folks that they barely knew
 And it puts a smile on my face, yes, it do
 And let me tell you, you ought to be smiling too
 Because the next time you're feeling kinda lonesome and blue
 Just think that someone somewhere might be singing about you
 So who knows if I'll ever see her again?
 Maybe we'll see
 This whole time, she could have been singing about me
 Probably not but it could be