Ketamine for Breakfast

Now look here, in the house opposite
 Black gate posts with a concrete frog squatting on top of it
 Through the hallway
 Ancient wallpaper, nicotine gold
 Up the stairs, rickety
 Loaded with history
 Here, in the top flat
 Flowers on the windowsill
 Little breeze fluttering the petals as they stare out
 At the city streets
 Gemma is awake
 What woke her?
 Open eyes, street lights float slowly through broken blinds
 She watches as the light plays across the tattered carpet
 And she holds herself tight in the room's half darkness
 It's cold
 She wedges her hands underneath her armpits
 It's 04: 18
 And Gemma's thinking
 Before I was a adult
 I was a little wreck
 Peddling whatever I could get my grubby mitts on
 Ketamine for beakfast
 Bad girls were drinking with
 I gave 'em puppy dog eyes for the acid on their fingertips
 Heads in the basement
 Lips without faces
 Getting faced in, half-baked in a bakery
 Eating pastries
 Desperate for a body who could save me
 But I never really wondered what they gave me
 Always wanted something else
 Sweating in the door queue
 Spittin' like a villain in the pantomime old shoes
 Bad teeth
 Drinking in the rain with my ghost
 Sitting in the back of the class, comatose
 Uh, feelings on my back in the dark
 Hold me close
 But you never held
 I did some things I swore I'd never
 'Til that night you tried to kill me
 Run me down with your car in the snow
 I didn't realize I thought you would go
 Every day I live lives in the day I wake up in
 My dreams are all screaming "Oh fuck!"
 But I'm fine now
 Something remains, it's still pulling me
 Yeah my future is bright but my past tryna ruin me
 Tried to change it but I know
 If you're good to me I will let you go
 Tried to fight it but I'm sure
 If you're bad to me, I will like you more
 I saw some things when I was young
 That made me who I would become
 I feel them with me everyday
 'Cause if you try and run away
 They run beside you place for place
 Trip you up and drag your face
 Freedom out of every waste
 They chancing every bit of taste
 Heart is sprayed up with the names
 Of all my friends who lost their way
 Doesn't change it all remains
 It takes my strength and gives me shame
 All I want is someone great
 To make me everything I ain't
 But the only ones for me
 Are the ones that shouldn't be
 Even though I'm doing good
 I'm working hard, my work is strong
 Might be fun just for a while
 To go back to where my hurt is from
 Rinse myself through emptiness
 And push my body close to
 Anybody who can recognize the presence of my ghost
 Tried to change it but I know
 If you're good to me I will let you go
 Tried to fight it but I'm sure
 If you're bad to me I will like you more
 Tried to change it but I know
 If you're good to me I will let you go
 Tried to fight it but I'm sure
 If you're bad to me I will like you more