Fake ID

When I was 17 I was staying in NYC
 And my homie told me where I could get a fake Id
 "Aiyo son you better get that shit when you in NY"
 So I hopped on the subway and I gave it a try
 Plesant surprise the Id looked fine
 5'9, blues eyes, born in 1979
 Nervous as hell I went to the store with my homie
 Came out and yelled "Dawg they sold me a 40"
 You know that I was the man
 Buying the contraband with a fake ass hologram
 No more looking for bums, standing in the rain
 Stranded on Broadway and giving 'em all my change
 For the rest of the summer man I was on fades
 17, had it made, getting drunk everyday
 Eh, I got treated a whole new way
 Because of a piece of plastic that proved I was of age
 You know what I'm saying, all of a sudden you get this little piece of plastic and you're in the club.
 Now for the next three years I had so much fun
 Getting drunk in Hip-Hop clubs where you had to be 21
 Then one day I was walking and I saw a sign
 That said KRS-One 21 up and live
 That's hella tight
 Aiyo I heard he always ripped it
 So I hopped up in my Civic and went out to by a ticket
 When I got up the the door the bouncer checking Id's
 Looks at mine and he's like "Nah we don't take these"
 I tried to reach and grab my shit back
 But the mother fucker was tougher than Shaq, on crack
 I should of punched him, but I would have reached his knee cap
 And that probably wouldn't have hurt him very much
 He kept laughing and smilin' and he called me a dumb shit
 And if I would of let myself I would have cried in public
 Oh no, I'm like give it back bro
 But no, my Id was jacked by the Caucasian Deebo
 Ha I'm laughing right now but at the time it really was not funny and it's still not very funny. Fucker
 Bitch why you got to take my Id?
 Why do I have to be 21 to drink a Long Island Ice tea?
 I hate bouncers with their bald heads and ten foot long legs and shirts that they outgrew when they were like ten
 Get 'em
 Your mother is dumb for having you
 You're a bouncer because you have a small dick and as a kid everyone laughed at you
 Get 'em
 You're too big and you never seemed to listen
 You look injected with the shit they give to KFC chickens
 Get 'em
 I don't like ya, at all I despise you
 If I was tall I would fight you
 If I was a dog I would bite you
 Every single day you make people cry
 And your job is to go and ruin teenager's lives
 Ok I'm going too far bouncers aren't all bad
 I'm sure they make great husbands and really strong dads
 But hopefully you learned a lesson from me
 Never take an MC's fake Id
 Yup, I said never take an MC's fake Id
 You could be buff and tough, it don't matter to me
 'Cause you're going to get burned if you step to MCs