If I Were a Bell

Ask me how do I feel,
 Now that we're cosy and clinging,
 Well sir, all I can say is
 If I were a bell I'd be ringing!
 From the moment we kissed goodnight,
 That's the way I just gotta behave,
 And if I were a lamp I'd light,
 Or if I were a banner I'd wave!
 Ask me how do I feel,
 Little me with my quiet upbringing,
 Well sir, all I can say is
 If I were a gate I'd be swinging!
 And if I were a watch,
 I'd start popping my spring,
 Oh, and if I were a bell
 I'd go "Ding dong ding dong ding!".
 Ask me how do I feel
 From this chemistry lesson I'm learning,
 Well sir, all I can say is
 If I were a bridge I'd be burning!
 Well, I knew my moral would crack
 From the wonderful way you looked,
 Boy, if I were a duck I'd quack,
 Or if I were a goose I'd be cooked!
 Ask me how do I feel
 Now that we're fondly caressing,
 And if I were a salad,
 I know I'd be splashing my dressing!
 Or if I were a season,
 I'd surely be Spring,
 Yes, and if I were a bell,
 Say, if I were a bell,
 If I were a bell
 I'd go "Ding dong ding dong ding!".