Not Good But Better

I ain't always good, but I'm feeling better though
 Drinking whiskey, hetero, calendar is lookin' like the
 Skillset, there ain't a lot of hoes in my schedule
 Homies on the same shit, I no longer meddle though
 I ain't tryna give the tea, but I got kettles though
 I want everyone to love me, but I'm a rebel though
 And my music take 'em places I don't get to go
 Haven't come to terms with that, I'll feel more than I'll ever know
 I have got to, I have got to
 I have got to get away 'fore I'm out of my mind
 I thought too hard, I lost you
 Y'all try and stop, who really loves you? What you tryin' to find?
 Try and make space for my feelings, that shit make me humble
 Save grace for the meals, healin' is a stumble
 If you gon' thank God for the blessings, thank Him for the troubles
 Get a couple chips, and then they fold, that's how the cookie crumbles
 I guess I let the fear project
 I say, I love, they hear, reject
 And here's the rub, I made a mess
 I cleaned it off by bleeding less
 Can't understand what we accept
 Can't understate how we neglect
 They underrate 'til we give less
 I'm underpaid, I'm overstressed
 I ain't always good, but I'm feeling better though
 Drinking whiskey, hetero, calendar is lookin' like the
 Skillset, there ain't a lot of hoes in my schedule
 Homies on the same shit, I no longer meddle though
 I ain't tryna give the tea, but I got kettles though
 I want everyone to love me, but I'm a rebel though
 And my music take 'em places I don't get to go
 Haven't come to terms with that, I'll feel more than I'll ever know
 I have got to, I have got to
 I have got to get away 'fore I'm out of my mind
 I thought too hard, I lost you
 Y'all try and stop, who really loves you? What you tryin' to find?