Ballad of a Pandemic

I got a fake tin hat and a pin on my chest
 I got a disinfected scarf on my neck
 There's a lot on our plate and I don't mean food
 There's a lot of bad things that could really hurt you
 I'm scared
 I'm afraid of dying as much as the next guy
 I want you to be fine more than I can describe
 Sit tight on your couch like a soldier in a dressing gown
 Wear plastic gloves and please don't come around
 I'm scared
 And help your neighbour
 Even if they're not nice
 Help your neighbour
 Even if they're hostile
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 Help your neighbour
 Even if they're not nice
 Help your neighbour
 Even if they're hostile
 When it couldn't get worse, it does just that
 Death is exponential, but this life is flat
 And I'm borderline, too mushy about this
 But if you're not kind now, then your eulogy will stink
 And I...