Clancy's Wooden Wedding

Five years ago last Sunday Patty Clancy took a wife
 'twas Little Bridget at Haley who would to fix to him for life
 so he gave a wooden wedding the event to celebrate
 and he sent out invitations to his friends both small and great
 Now everyone was supposed to bring a present made of wood
 some of the things they brought were bad and some were very good
 but everyone who came they did the very best they could
 when Clancy had a weddin' made of wood
 Well there were all kinds of wood brought to the house that night
 soft wood and hard wood and kindling wood delight
 wood and wooden shavings enough to fill a bed
 'twas brought to Clancy's house when he was five years wed
 Now the first one to get there was Pat O'Hoolihan,
 he brought for a present a Japanese fan
 then came Maloney as neat as a pin
 he brought a cradle for to rock the baby in
 O'Brien brought a sawhorse handsomely engraved
 O'Toole brought a cord of wood for which he didn't pay
 Murphy brought the clothespins and Ryan brought a broom
 and it looked as though a lumberyard exploded in the room
 And there was
 Wood that came from China, wood that came from Spain
 wood from Jerusalem across the ragin' main
 wood that came from Russia sent by the Csar
 wood that came from Ireland enough to build a car
 wood that came from Scotland, wood that came from jails
 wood that came from England, wood that came from Wales
 they passed around the whiskey and they passed around the ale
 and if the glasses wasn't big enough they used a wooden pail
 everyone was feelin' good no one was feelin' dry
 all around the glory and the glory it was high
 someone asked Clancy, "Would he sing a song?"
 Clancy said he would, but his voice was gone
 Up jumped Maloney and he gave a recitation
 all about the kind of wood that grew in every nation
 "Begorra such a racket I can't keep it mum!"
 O'Brien called Maloney an educated bum
 So up jumped Maloney and he gave him such a whack
 it raised up a hump in the middle of his back
 that was the signal and they all began to fight
 and the women hollared, "Murder!" and they said it wasn't right
 O'Brien threw the frying pot and he threw the frying pan
 Murphy threw the poker and it hit O'Hoolihan
 Patrick lost his false teeth and through the window dove
 Maloney sat down on a red hot stove
 There was all kinds of wood went flyin' through the air
 Brady hit O'Grady with the round of a chair
 Murphy grabbed Sullivan and threw him on the bed
 stabbed him with a clothespin and left him there for dead
 Police got twenty five and thirty got away
 they took then up before the judge the very next day
 the judge looked them over as before him they stood
 he gave them sixty days in jail... now they're all sawing wood