Hours Outside in the Snow

I spent all of Christmas Eve fake angry at you for
 Who knows what or then and you spoke so fast
 I just sat back relaxed and took you all in
 I spent all of Christmas Eve trying to get warmer
 After standing outside for hours knowing at this point
 I'd be lucky to get any sleep
 And I'll toss and turn until the early morning
 Happily ignoring that my blue jeans
 Didn't do a fucking thing for me
 Against this cold
 Sober or not, I locked everything you sent me
 Cause what's better than seeing
 What I'm missing daily
 I guess what I'm trying to say is that
 You might run but I won't hide
 Shed an ounce of light
 On my half-hopeless life
 Don't let me go back
 And though I'd like to say more
 I guess, I'll just duck in cover
 Almost praying that you trip over
 The cluster of words I laid out before having to leave
 But since you've taken the time to read so carefully
 Everything I've ever sent
 I guess I'll spend the few lines
 Hoping and wishing
 Yet thanking appropriately
 You might run but I won't hide
 Shed an ounce of light
 On my half-hopeless life
 Don't let me go back
 To Erin: Please read later
 Cause I don't think I have the heart
 To let you read this now
 But if I had the heart
 You know that I know better
 This isn't how you say aloud
 "Don't let me go back"