Bad Spanish

Keep my mouth shut cause I don't deserve anything
 Feeling like a fraud at my job, cause I've faked my way
 Into every good thing that's ever happened to me
 Write a happy song cause I don't wanna mope today
 Try to sing along, but the thoughts they don't go away
 I will say the worst things to make you stay
 It's hard to ask for help if you don't really want it
 Passed out on the train in your own vomit
 "It's fine" I said, I'll bash my fucking head through the wall
 So I don't have to call you before I go to bed
 "Alright" I said, won't hold my fucking breath while you're gone
 But I feel it in my lungs
 Before I go to bed
 Dreaming in bad spanish bout your romantic tendencies
 And how they would translate in your fucked up fantasies
 You're the only good thing
 That's ever happened to me
 It's hard to ask for help if you don't really want it
 Passed out on the train in your own vomit
 "It's fine" I said, I'll bash my fucking head through the wall
 So I don't have to call you before I go to bed
 "Alright" I said, I'll scrape my knuckles red
 Stucco wall
 Do I have to be sad to get off?
 Or I'll never leave my head