Madam Plum

Oh Elliot Plum, the hard earnest one of all of my good friends
 Had a wife named Marguerite who loved him for pretend
 Nevermind how the story starts
 I'll tell you how this ends
 He'd step out to the back she put her lipstick on my neck
 Oh Madame Plum
 Man I hate to have to eat and run
 But your husband and the Mossberg pump got me on their minds
 Oh Madame Plum
 Man I hate to have to ruin the fun
 But your husband and the Mossberg pump got me on their minds
 She got 'em good like I knew she would then weeks had come to pass
 My old intrepid tendencies found a tavern off the map
 Petrified I called a quarter ride it was Marguerite at last
 She grabbed a rounded taste then wrapped her legs around my waist
 Oh Madame Plum
 Man I hate to have to eat and run
 But your husband and the Mossberg pump got me on their minds
 Oh Madame Plum
 Man I hate to have to ruin the fun
 But your husband and the Mossberg pump got me on their minds
 Oooooh oh Madame Plum
 You done us both so wrong
 I been running for too long
 And quite frankly, I'm tired
 Oh, Madam Plum
 I think I hear Elliot now
 And this time I'ma stand my ground
 I swear by it
 Oh! Elliot Plum!
 Of all my friends you were the best,
 But if you take one more step,
 Its certain death!
 Oh, now see,
 Guess that's the way it had to be
 All thanks to Marguerite
 Ooooooh, Madame Plum
 Man I hate to have to eat and run
 But your husband and the Mossberg pump had me on their minds
 Oh Madame Plum
 Man I hate to have to ruin the fun
 But your husband and the Mossberg pump had me on the ruuun
 Oh Madame Plum
 Man I hate 'cha made me do what I done
 Now your husband in an 'ol pine box gots em on the ground
 Oh Madame Plum
 Now I'm truly out here on the run
 Because these sorries and these canines cryin got my scents and gun