Thanksgiving

As this time of year comes 'round again
 I find myself reflecting on all the things for which I'm grateful
 Like my family and friendships
 and the fact my life is relatively free from pain and tragedy
 There's so much I am thankful for but still
 If there's someone or something out there responsible for all of this
 and listening to me thank them
 then I ask you Sir or Madam
 will you kindly tell George Lucas to stop screwing with our trilogy
 And on behalf of all of us say,
 "George ... please fucking stop."
 I am thankful for the Firefly crew
 especially for Kaylee
 And I am thankful I won't live to see the rise of the machines
 And I'm thankful that Joss Whedon is directing the Avengers
 And speaking of directors
 Hey there, George
 A movie is a snapshot of the era it was made in
 Like a painting or a photograph
 And we won't go back to change them if Avengers ends up sucking
 We'll just shrug and then we'll go make something new
 So fucking stop
 Everybody knows Darth Vader didn't say a goddamn word
 when he threw the Emperor down the Death Star two's reactor shaft
 And everybody knows that Greedo never even fired
 when Han shoots first it sets up his entire moral journey
 Plus it's cool
 I know that in the scheme of things it's just a first world problem
 and there's many more important issues
 even so I'm asking you
 that if you're not too busy with the problems of the universe
 And if you have a moment I would sure appreciate
 if you drop in on Mr Lucas, maybe grab him by his neckbeard
 and vigorously shake him and say, "George it's very simple
 Just release the goddamn blu-ray with the versions we remember
 Then shut up and take our money and then please ...
 please fucking stop."