Moonsickness

There's so much to do
 I'll never have the wherewithal
 To do it all again
 Or fucking do it all at all
 I love you so much
 I don't wanna go but
 Everybody knows this place is dying, as am I
 I might not get another chance
 It's such a careful dance and
 I am such a fuckup, if you only knew
 That I am such a fuckup
 I've got 100 hours to rearrange the stars
 And I'm the worst mistake that God has ever made
 
 You seem to integrate so fucking well
 But I make lemons out of lemonade
 
 Blood clots and death cramps
 Injections and leakages
 The election cycle and the tide
 Aztec circles of the death of all deaths
 But the beast refuses to die
 In your guts, you know it's all destroyed
 You could've had a boy
 If you had children now, you think
 You might just put them down
 None of us belong
 Everything I do is wrong
 And soon there will be nobody left around
 And in your blood you know what's right
 And in your bones you know what's wrong
 And in your throat you know you're lying to kids
 And you know nobody belongs in this hell
 And there is not a single choice left to make
 I am God's worst mistake
 And you seem happy on the knife's edge
 But I just lick the blade
 I've got 100 hours to rearrange the stars
 And I'm the worst mistake your God has ever made
 You seem to integrate so fucking well
 But I make lemons out of lemonade
 ♪
 Blood clots, death camps
 Gluts and depressions
 The business cycle and the tide
 
 Concentric circles of torture wheels
 But the beast refuses to die
 Atomistic rational behavior
 Invisible hand savior
 Fucking up your definitions even though it's life or death
 Who fucking told you, you were selfish
 Or even self-interested
 Don't you think it matters when we wish our friends the best
 And fuck I'm not a Marxist
 I'm not a fucking democrat
 Because of all this bullshit, I'm not anything at all
 All I wanted was a framework
 None of them can live here
 There's nothing to believe in and there won't be until we fall
 And it's not all you man
 You were just a kid once
 God, I'm such a fuckup
 If you only knew that I am such a fuckup
 I've got 100 hours to rearrange the stars
 And I'm the worst mistake your God has ever made
 I can't get the numbers right
 I can't fucking count because not one goddamned thing is in its place
 Blood clots, death camps
 Gluts and depressions
 The business cycle and the tide
 
 You fuckers know it's all built on lies
 But the beast refuses to die
 And so I guess well neither can I