My Pathetic Past

No prize for congeniality
 Never knew popularity
 Oh, this ugly stick had wished
 To one day become a swan
 Always picked last for sports teams
 Got cheated out of my wet dream
 I missed out on teenage sex
 Was too busy beating off the Reader's Digest
 Well, I can't help but laugh
 At my pathetic past
 From now on things will be different
 Every day will now be recess
 Beaten up by football jocks
 Forced to hide in toilet stalls
 I chased home by rabid dogs
 And somehow survived it all
 "Kick Me" sign taped to my back
 I had to run out of my art class
 Shit rolling out of my slacks
 Chasing me down the stairwell
 And I can't help but laugh
 At my pathetic past
 From now on things will be different
 Every day will now be recess
 ♪
 And I can't help but laugh
 At my pathetic past
 From now on things will be different
 Every day will now be recess