Gretel

Ward off great evil
 'Fore I reach the front door
 What am I in hell for?
 Was I born to be tortured?
 Creatures, medieval
 Can you guide me?
 (Yes, of course)
 Fairy, goblin, unicorn
 Point me the way with your horn
 So you don't believe me
 Well, I'll make it easy
 I'll burst open the seams with you standing next to me
 What look like raisins
 Are plastered on my skin
 Naturally occurring monster making condition
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 It's not the effect of poison ivy
 I go hiking carefully
 How come they want me on TV?
 Am I really that much of a freak?
 Why ever would I come out of hiding
 When nobody's nice to me?
 How could anyone think I'm lovely
 When they retch at the sight of me?
 I'd like to get groovy, to drink a mango smoothie
 I'd like to watch a movie without everyone, and the sun
 Telling me that I look dumb
 Hate my buds, just because there's not enough room for us
 They forced me to eat ice
 Then I broke my teeth and cried
 Jekyll, Hyde, Dragon, Slime
 The only ones who are kind
 Not my fault my body's spots resemble dried apricots
 Beedo, Appadeebin
 Wish I did, but I don't believe him
 All I want is a quiet evening
 And now you're telling me my dream's not one that's worth believing in?
 Eedo, Appigo Appadeeben
 Yeah, I'm ugly, but there is a reason
 I came out of the oven too seasoned
 Sometimes there's a casserole that just isn't worth eating
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 I imagine self-worth and inner peace
 Tastes like artificial cherry
 No, wait, maybe more like ice cream
 Either way, I really could use some flavouring
 Come one, everybody, come one, come all
 The circus clown has dropped the ball
 "How about we give her a face full of pie?"
 For some reason, in return, you'd still expect a smile
 And, whenever you get mad
 I'm your walking punching bag
 Can your conscience handle that?
 It shouldn't be you, the one who's feeling bad
 Not with all your intact arteries
 I'd like to get groovy, to drink a mango smoothie
 I'd like to watch a movie without
 Everyone, and the sun telling me I'm not enough
 Why would I enjoy this?
 No, I'm not a masochist
 With red gloves, all you touch
 Certainly will get marked up
 I, in fact, in light of this
 Became your painting canvas
 It's me against you and dad
 Not afraid to punch him back
 Happen to want to get hurt badly?
 Then go ahead and try messing with me
 I assure you I'll split you to atoms for free
 Worse than that, I'll steal all the chocolate
 Out your dear chocolate chip cookies
 Purposely misplace your keys
 Be the reason why you sneeze
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 When I say green you think of cheese
 But in my mind, I'm picturing some fresh tangerines
 You take pictures, I'll fake a smile through gritting teeth
 You might surmise it's not the same
 But you know that I won't play your game
 Wasted all your day and let me get away with it
 If you look like me, don't go out at night
 To a man on edge, you could give a fright
 And in self-defence, he'll take out a knife
 Wouldn't want to cause a scene
 Looking like it's time for me to fly away
 Maybe I'll see you another day
 Sike, you're probably going the other way
 So give a smother to my brother when you see him, okay?
 Luckily, on my diet, I don't eat meat
 For someone who looks like an animal, I'm rather picky!
 Not a monster 'cause I don't hate babies
 I don't skip cut-scenes
 Eating my own kind is against my beliefs
 You, though had no problem tearing life and limb from Ted and Jim, so
 Made of stone, your evil heart must be
 Could be that your cup of love is filled with liquid savagery
 O-o-oh, yippadie-dee, oh, yippadie-doh, doh
 Went to the potluck with scones
 You won't take any home, I know
 But I suppose maybe I just want to do some baking
 Take it from me, looks couldn't kill, no, but they can get you disowned
 "We won't look at her"
 Is that so?
 Then my baked goods are no longer free for the taking
 Thanks for the pizza, I'll take a mango, blend it up real nice and slow
 My dear friends, I have made it home
 Rewarded with time alone