Luigi's Ballad (Karaoke Version)

Princess Peach
 Won't you listen to my speech
 I don't have any stars of invincibility
 But you're the brightest star in the sky tonight for me
 I'm your Luigi
 What up, bitch, I got a one-up, bitch
 What's inside the question block; it's my dick
 It's-a-me, a-Mario, I'm more Italian than pastrami
 I'll take you by the peaches and give you the hot salami
 I save you from dragons and evil Boos that are spooky
 Must I be a raccoon to get inside your tanooki
 I will mount you like Yoshi and show you things you've never seen
 My mushroom's now mega, if you know what I mean
 So suck it
 Mario, you always do this shit
 I like a girl and then you ruin it
 By yelling stuff about your dick
 Until they go away
 Hey Luigi, it's okay
 That Mario's a bit risque
 Just tell me what you need to say
 Please don't be afraid
 Oh, princess, it means so much for me to hear you say that
 The only thing I've ever wanted to tell you is that-goddamn it
 I'm here to pleasure that ass
 I'd like to go first, princess, but I always come last
 And you say we'll get together but I'm jacking off alone
 Koopa Troopa skeletons aren't the only dry bones
 I am tired of the running 'round it's such a fucking hassle
 I go through shit and then you're in another fucking castle
 You gotta think about it, well I don't believe the hype
 You'll have a lot of time to think when you are smoking on my warp pipe
 O-M-G, I can't decide
 On which of you should be the guy
 To take me on your mustache ride
 That'll redefine my life
 I'm ready to give love a shot
 It's not about how many coins you've got
 I just know I like you a lot
 Yo, sluts, check out my yacht (Ugh)
 Let me take you on a magic kart ride
 I'll bust all your balloons when I smack your backside
 We'll have such fun, I'll bring my friends along
 I'll kick that Donkey Kong right in his konkey dong
 Come on, Peach, it's time to make your choice
 I'm the only plumber that can your boobies rejoice
 Green, lanky-ass brother ain't got shit on me
 It's time to live out our story, of the princess and the pe-
 Nis
 So, who's it gonna be, princess?
 I choose... Toad
 Toad?!
 Well his whole body's shaped like a dick
 Oh yeah, mmmhm, yeah, definitely, mushrooms look like dicks