Try Not to Die Until You're Dead

I smile to trick the fear inside me
 I smile to seem like I'm improving
 But the brave grin does not go in
 A surface layer painted on the skin
 Of a body that is facing uncertainty
 Yesterday I chased a dream
 Now I just want to be able to sleep
 Suddenly riddled with incapability
 Funny how illness changes everything
 Never really believed in believing
 Until I had to believe I would get better
 And that was all I had, no knowledge or progress
 Just hope, wafer thin hope
 Clung onto with a fist
 Must try not to damage it
 I must believe
 And even if I don't get better
 Thanks for sitting with me while I cried
 Thanks for easing the hours when I was too weak to stand
 Thanks for all the little detours where we wandered off together
 And found things more important than what we want
 Those are truly treasured moments
 And believe me I know
 That it's hard to have hope
 But I will try not to die until I am dead
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 I will try not to die until I am dead
 I may be aching and exhausted, but life's not over yet
 I will try not to die until I am dead
 I may be aching and exhausted, but life's not over yet
 So it doesn't hurt to hope and it will never hurt to try
 Try not to die until you're dead
 So it doesn't hurt to hope and it will never hurt to try
 Try not to die until you're dead
 So it doesn't hurt to hope and it will never hurt to try
 Try not to die until you're dead