We Wish You a Merry Christmas

We wish you a merry Christmas
 We wish you a merry Christmas
 We wish you a merry Christmas
 And a happy New Year
 We wish you the best day ever
 And hope all your Christmas endeavors
 Are super-fun, amazing, and clever
 And that your New Year's rocks, too
 Oh, come tell me what'cha doin'
 All my relatives just flew in
 From Mexico and Jerusalem
 For the holidays
 Both Christmas trees and menorahs
 It can be confusing for us
 When we break into a chorus
 Of "olé" (olé) and "oy vey" (oy vey)
 Good missions I'll give
 To agents A through Z
 Carl, get away from that punch bowl
 I'm saving that for me (sorry, sir)
 We wish you a Perry Christmas
 We wish you a Perry Christmas
 We wish you a Perry Christmas
 And a- New Year
 I wish for a calculator
 Slash-Hindi-English translator
 To find a common denominator
 In both of my tongues
 Good wedgies I'll give
 To all of you nerds
 That's how I say "merry Christmas"
 I ain't good with words
 I wish you would let me rule you
 In evil, I'm going to school you
 I won't sugarcoat or fool you
 Your New Year's looks grim
 I warn you, my new -inator
 Will force you to serve me later
 So why not just choose to cater
 To my every whim?
 We wish your every endeavor
 Makes this the best Christmas ever
 And we're all so glad that we will never
 Mention figgy pudding
 Oh, great, well now we've mentioned it
 You know, no one would have noticed if you'd have just kept your mouth shut