Becoming More Like Alfie

Are you all settled in? Right, then we can begin. My name is...
 ALFIE!
 Once there was a time
 When my mind lay on higher things
 And once there was a time
 I could find pretty words to sing
 But now, well now I find
 It saves time to say what you mean
 I know it seems so unrefined
 But it's time to let off some steam
 Oh come on!
 Everybody knows that No means Yes
 Just like glasses come free on the N.H.S.
 But the more I look through them the more I see
 I'm becoming more like Alfie
 Once there was a time
 When a kind word could be enough
 And once there was a time
 I could blindfold myself with love
 But not now—now I'm resigned
 To the kind of life I had reserved
 For other guys less smart than I
 Y'know—the kind who will always end up with the girls
 And besides
 Everybody knows that No means Yes
 Just like glasses come free on the N.H.S.
 But the more I look through them the more I see
 I'm becoming more like Alfie
 Oh come on!
 I'm becoming more like Alfie