Emergency

I always tell myself to be patient
 But my left hand shakes
 Against your new couch
 Control of the situation
 Fell through my fingers
 I heard her say:
 "You can't keep living as if you're dying"
 Well, I'm dying
 Now in an awkward way
 To spend the holiday
 In such a deviant way to behave
 It's amazing how quiet this house is
 When the world outside,
 It celebrates their new years
 And their new fears
 Your addiction is okay,
 'Cause it's manically approved
 And the night has expired
 Lay me down to sleep
 But one more thing can you say diction
 And admit my guilt, emergency
 And emergency
 It's whispered at night
 Now in an awkward way
 To spend the holiday
 In such a deviant way to behave
 It's amazing how quiet this house is
 When the world outside,
 It celebrates their new years
 And their new fears