The Golf Song (Golfer's Lament)

Every month of the year when it's stormy or clear
 There's a place you can always find me
 Very calm and serene, looking down at the green
 While waiting my turn at the tee
 I may never shoot par for my shots don't go far
 Though I swing and I slug with great force
 Still I play right along, doing everything wrong
 You'll find me all over the course
 Oh, the golf bug has bitten me good
 I'm in love with a putter, an iron and a wood
 Such waste of time is a crime and a shame
 But golf is a crazy wonderful game
 I've spent hours with a pro, feeling sure he would know
 How to help me with good sound advice
 But the lessons I took to get rid of a hook
 Just gave me a terrible slice
 I can't rotate my hip, I don't use the right grip
 I suppose that I'm pressing too hard
 By the time that I add all the strokes that I've had
 I'd secretly tear up my card
 Oh, the golf bug has bitten me good
 I'm in love with a putter, an iron and a wood
 Such waste of time is a crime and a shame
 But golf is a crazy wonderful game
 I've decided to play 18 holes every day
 And perhaps now and then maybe more
 For until I'm too old, or so tired that I fold
 I'll try to improve on my score
 If I figure the cost of the balls I have lost
 And equipment I bought at the shop
 It would probably come to a sizeable sum
 But now it's too late, I can't stop
 Oh, the golf bug has bitten me good
 I'm in love with a putter, an iron and a wood
 Such waste of time is a crime and a shame
 But golf is a crazy wonderful game
 Oh, the golf bug has bitten me good
 I'm in love with a putter, an iron and a wood
 Such waste of time is a crime and a shame
 But golf is a crazy, golf is a crazy
 Golf is a crazy wonderful game
 Fore
 
 Every month of the year when it's stormy or clear
 There's a place you can always find me
 Very calm and serene, looking down at the green
 While waiting my turn at the tee
 I may never shoot par for my shots don't go far
 Though I swing and I slug with great force
 Still I play right along, doing everything wrong
 You'll find me all over the course
 Oh, the golf bug has bitten me good
 I'm in love with a putter, an iron and a wood
 Such waste of time is a crime and a shame
 But golf is a crazy wonderful game
 I've spent hours with a pro, feeling sure he would know
 How to help me with good sound advice
 But the lessons I took to get rid of a hook
 Just gave me a terrible slice
 I can't rotate my hip, I don't use the right grip
 I suppose that I'm pressing too hard
 By the time that I add all the strokes that I've had
 I'd secretly tear up my card
 Oh, the golf bug has bitten me good
 I'm in love with a putter, an iron and a wood
 Such waste of time is a crime and a shame
 But golf is a crazy wonderful game
 I've decided to play 18 holes every day
 And perhaps now and then maybe more
 For until I'm too old, or so tired that I fold
 I'll try to improve on my score
 If I figure the cost of the balls I have lost
 And equipment I bought at the shop
 It would probably come to a sizeable sum
 But now it's too late, I can't stop
 Oh, the golf bug has bitten me good
 I'm in love with a putter, an iron and a wood
 Such waste of time is a crime and a shame
 But golf is a crazy wonderful game
 Oh, the golf bug has bitten me good
 I'm in love with a putter, an iron and a wood
 Such waste of time is a crime and a shame
 But golf is a crazy, golf is a crazy
 Golf is a crazy wonderful game
 Fore