pathetic

The veins in my skin pop out when I'm warm
 I handle a blade and point to my arm
 Oh, she'd be upset if I put it through
 I'll put it away but only for you
 Well this time you won, you proud of yourself
 I put us down, no need to be held
 I've suffered too long in my mental state
 I'm harming myself, does it look like I'm okay?
 I said you were right
 And I'm sorry, just know I'm not bright
 Or the smartest, keep beating my eyes
 'Til they're blue and to where I can't see
 Now they're swollen, I'm blind in my view
 And now everyday feel like I lose
 But I'm trying to cope without you
 And it's hard, oh baby it's hard
 So wish mе your luck and your regards
 ♪
 It drips from my forearm to my shirt
 Watching the blood fall is thе worst
 Ignore all of your calls 'cause I've learned
 I made it a full year without her
 I listen to nonsense on a basis
 It's all in my head and it's my favorite
 I kept them around for entertainment
 I choose to stay private and faceless
 Don't text me
 Don't call me
 I've witness autopsy
 Don't come home
 I won't be here
 I left so it's sincere
 A lot's on my mind
 Like my future and maybe a wife
 And I wonder if music's my prize
 It's the only thing going for me
 Been a week since I've gone outside
 I'm pathetic it sums up my life
 Forgot her and God, it's about time
 And something that I can't help but think
 If you're disappointed in me
 ♪
 Tell me what you find
 Deep inside her eyes
 'Cause she used to be kind
 Until she lost her mind'
 Blade in the basement
 I'm high but I'm anxious
 I'm snapping back the hat when I am next in the rotation
 Thought I found myself but I'm in dissociation
 Love being alone but I don't fuck with isolation
 Quarter ounce
 Pack it up and take me out
 You said I'd be better now
 But all I got are pills around
 Where the fuck you've been at?
 (Where the fuck you've been at?)
 You left your nail marks on my back
 (You left your nail marks on my back)
 Now I'm going too fast
 (Going too fast, too fast, too fast, too fast)
 But I can't help but think about the past
 I just smoked what was left in the bag
 (I just smoked what's left, I just smoked what's left)
 And I really don't mind if I crash
 (I just smoked what's left)